I was unable to see his facial expression while he said this since he was sitting behind me in back seat, and his tone sounded genuinely curious – but this didn’t stop me from getting furious and defensive.
I am taking 18 credits.
should really study.
I have student leadership position in our student ministry.
I go to the gym.
I have a social life.
In the past I have completed service learning hours or volunteered.
In the past I gone home
too often on the weekends.
And then, after those few moments, I realized I’m not really doing much.
It’s my senior year.
I deserve to slack off.
I deserve not to do anything, because God isn’t telling me to do anything.
I’m still waiting.
I believe rest is good (and necessary) for the soul.
I believe that as Christians we must be careful not to seek to or find our identity in our professions or hobbies.
I believe that God didn’t create us just so we could serve Him, but so that we could worship Him.
However, I’m not really resting. I’m just being a poor steward of my time. I like calling it YOLO-ing.
My attention to school work and student ministry leadership position is lacking. I’m staying up ridiculously late, for no reason. My sad attempts at “living it up” usually results in getting a Frosty+ or pizza after midnight. I’m continuing to have an apathetic outlook for no reason.
I had a similar blog post to this a few months ago. None of those goals were accomplished (but much of that is due to working at camp this summer. A blog post is on it’s way about that experience). The way I see it, this proves how I need to serve God by doing more things.
A few of those things are
- Starting to mentor a younger student leader in the ministry I’m involved in.
- Get in better shape (and develop a plan for that).
- Find eight different internship postings and apply for them.
- Donate plasma.
- Blog once a week. Choose a day that is my blog day. Keep track of blog ideas.
- Use my planner again, and make a schedule so that I use my time more wisely.
- Sign up for a 10 and 13.1 mile run for this spring. That’s right – a half marathon.
Few of these things are exceptionally challenging. Many of them are responsibilities I had to do before writing this post. But I think stating this will help me stop just standing still from fear, and help God speak to me more about my future.
“And when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left, your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it.'” Isaiah 31.1